who is this me person?

“To find ones self, it to reach true happiness” – random note on the bottom of my date pad.

So, at work I have this little calendar and each day, it feels the need to throw an ‘inspirational’ quote at me, none of which make any sense at all.

Do we really know what it actually MEANS to find ones self? I know that I have NOOOOO idea at all.

I put my google skills to the test and tried to find out what exactly people think this means and the most common answer was this:

“to look inner at yourself.”

Well gee, that is insightful. How in the world do you describe to someone how look into themselves???

“You don’t know who you are, go and find yourself” is a statement that I have been struggling with for a long time now.

I have heard so many people say “go travelling and FIND YOURSELF” “go on an adventure and discover who you TRULY ARE” “don’t get married until you are at least 30, your too young to know who you are before then.”

What I would like to know is this:

How does spending thousands of dollars to go and see pretty landmarks make you have an epiphany as to who you are?

How does suddenly having your 30th birthday enlighten you as to whom your true inner self is?
To me, none of this makes sense.

It says in the Bible that God created us in his own image, so to me, it only makes sense that we can truly find ourselves in Him. Not by travelling, not by trying lots of different crazy things to see what floats our boat and what sinks it, and not by sitting there ALONE until we suddenly hit 30.

I don’t think that having a birthday or going around the world it the way that we discover who we are.

I would argue that you actually can NEVER know who you are perfectly without REALLY knowing who God is.

I have honestly got no idea who “Claire” is. I know what she wants, I know what she likes and what she dislikes and I know what she wants out of life, maybe this is what finding ‘you’ means – but this seems somewhat shallow.

Perhaps just doing life, loving others and maturing in your Christian walk is the only way to discover who you are.

I don’t know really how to describe who I am. If someone asked me if I have ‘found myself’ I think I would laugh at them and tell them I have no idea what that even means. But I also think that right now, if I was to go of and backpack through Europe I would come back just as clueless I was when I left.

I think its hard to really be able to sit there and DEFINE specific things that make me, well, me. Its easy to define the shallow things – what colour I like, what food I like, what things I enjoy and what things drive me crazy, the things I am passionate about and then things that I don’t really think about etc. but there is so much more to me than just that, things that are seemingly impossible to describe.

Maybe God is the only person who can truly say that he KNOWS me. The only person who really knows who I am. Maybe I will actually never be enlightened as to how to answer someone when they ask me if I have found myself.

The only thing that I do know is this:

I know who I am in the Lord.

For me, this is one of the most important things to discover in life and for me, that is all that REALLY matters. That is all that I really care about.